In a beautiful and clean courtyard is a small parapet made of red stone about 15 cms high from the ground. On it is spread a white embroidered tablecloth and on that is a tray in which are kept three idols of brass. One is of Rama, second is of Sita and the third of Laxman. They are all arranged together but the idol of Rama is in the front, a little behind is Sita's and further behind is Laxman's. In front of this tray, on a black sheet spread on the top of a carpet, is sitting a lady.
The lady is in her early middle age. Her eyes are fixed on the brass idol of Rama. After some time her eyes blinked and she said: O respected god, why don't you, even once, open your eyes and look towards me? My entire life has passed in worshipping you but it is my bad luck, my bad deeds that you have not responded to my worship. I have heard, you have met your devotees many times but why there is delay in my case. Oh ho! Am I not a devotee? I have not done good deeds. I am a sinner in the cycle of births and deaths.
But what was there in Gaj? You blessed him also. Maybe I am more of a sinner.
Oh! It is so difficult to worship. Devotion is very difficult. To keep the body away from sinful deeds and go on the path of worship is really difficult. I have done everything but Rama has not responded to my worship. It appears my worship is not enough. Oh ho!
Thus uttering, like a mad woman, she got up and went up to the other end of the verandah. There, on the settee, was lying a sitar. She picked up the sitar, brought it and sat in front of the idols as before and her fingers started playing the sitar. In a short while her throat opened and she sang a prayer.
The prayer was sung with so much devotion that it was really heart-piercing. The lady whose name was Jassi had described in the song her longing and earnest desire to meet Lord Rama. As the wax melts when the candle burns, her heart became soft and tears flowed from her eyes. The fingers stopped. The sitar stopped. It was quiet.
Jassi got concentration of mind. She felt as if the idol has moved. It has become man-like. It has opened his eyes. It has moved his lips and is uttering something. Jassi thought that her worship has borne fruit today. Even earlier, Rama had responded to the call of his devotees. Similarly, today also he has responded to my worship.
But Jassi was a sensible lady. She opened her eyes and saw minutely whether it had really happened or it was an imagination of her mind only. She opened her eyes again and to her dismay, she found the idols of the same size, lying in front of her, as they had been kept originally.
Now, in disappointment she again cried and said: In this Un-enlightened era (Kalyug), no amount of worship can change an idol into a living form. She was sitting in this dejection that Dhabli, her maid, came. This woman was from Bikaner and was in her service. She had left her home in poverty a long time back and worked at many places and many houses and had become experienced and sensible. She had a loving nature. In Jassi's house she got love and she stayed on.
She came and said: One sadhu has come. I have made him sit in the front room in comfort and have told him that my mistress is offering prayers. When she finishes offering her prayers, she will come. (After looking at her face) Oh ho! Again you are sobbing.
O mistress, you will spoil your eyes in crying. Can an idol see your tears or listen your crying? In a pandit's house I heard that the idols are just for a little concentration of mind. You have been worshipping in front of the idols for years. Have they ever spoken? They will never speak. O mistress, don't spoil your eyes.
On listening to the angrily but lovingly spoken words of the maid, Jassi did not become angry but started thinking.
Then she said: Dhabli, you do not have faith. You are not civilized.
It is the Un-enlightened era (Kalyug). The gods are silent When my worship becomes strong then the idols will speak. The power of my worship will make them speak.
Dhabli: O.K. Then you take good care of your eyes, so that they are there to see the glimpse. If you are not able to see when the god will appear in human form, then it will be of no good to you.
Jassi laughed and saying Rama, Rama, Long live Rama, she stood up, kept the sitar back, changed her clothes and went to meet the sadhu who was waiting in the front room.
She greeted him: Long live Sita and Rama.
The sadhu blessed her, saying, 'May Rama bless you with his love' and then started talking: I have come from Ayudhia. I heard you are worshipping the idol of Rama with great devotion. So, I thought when I go to Vrindavan, then, I shall also go to Agra and meet you.
Lady: Listen pious man, my devotion is nothing. In childhood only, one sadhu had initiated me into idol worship and singing of devotional songs. Whatever he said, I have been doing. Now, I am forty plus and I have lived a pure life away from worldly desires and away from sensual desires. I have been keeping fasts on all auspicious days of the year. I have been to sacred places also but my worship has borne no fruit.
Sadhu: This idol worship, decorating the idols with flowers, burning the incense and other rituals was the first step. If you want to have a glimpse, then you have to go further.
Lady: O.K. Then what is the next step?
Sadhu: Singing of devotional songs.
Jassi: Well, I have been reciting praises of Rama and have been singing devotional songs also in accompaniment with sitar.
Sadhu: No. (Nodding his head) Not in front of the idol. If you desire a glimpse, then you must consider that it is the Un-enlightened era (Kalyug). The gods do not appear in the idols. The gods appear in a living body.
Jassi: (with a little un-easy feeling) Living body? Do you mean a human body, a man?
Sadhu: (Seeingjassi's un-easiness) No. Not in an ordinary man.
I mean, in a saint's body when he gets engrossed in Rama's love. Then, Rama comes and appears in his body.
Jassi: (Nodding her head) This is somewhat risky. In idol worship one is not afraid that anybody will deceive. One's character remains pure in idol worship.
Sadhu: I heard you do meet sadhus.
Jassi: Yes. I do meet sadhus, but I do not meet them with a view to worship them. I consider them holy and I respect them. I only desire a glimpse
of Rama and nothing less than Rama.
Sadhu: (relaxing his forehead) Well, the path is the same that I tell you. You see Rama's theatre.
Jassi: Rama's theatre is going on in the entire world and that I see everyday.
Sadhu: No mother. Whatever Rama did when he was in this world, his saints are now doing in the form of a theatre. Seeing the scenes of Rama actually living increases the faith and devotion and sometimes in the person who is acting as Rama, Rama comes and enters his body. That is the time for a glimpse. At that time Rama does all what he was doing when he was in this world.
Jassi: Rama theatre that used to be in September, now the Mohammedan rulers do not allow its performance.
Sadhu: Yes, they do not permit that one. But I am not talking about the theatre that used to be in September. This is a congregation of selected saints who perform on all days round the year.
Jassi: Is it the same type as the Krishna theatre?
Sadhu: Yes mother. But here no ordinary person performs. Only selected holy saints, pure souls perform. Jassi: Now I understand.
Sadhu: Rama appears in them sometimes. Not everyday, but sometimes at a particular time. Like day before yesterday, when the saint was performing the act of 'Rama blesses Bheelni', Rama appeared in the saint's body. Ah ha, it was a wonderful delight. Mother, you come and see. What is the harm in seeing? Mother, it is a sacred theatre of Rama.
Jassi: Why should there be any harm? It is a pious thing. But is there no ban from the rulers?
Sadhu: No. They take some money. Then there is no ban.
Jassi: O.K. Then, where and when is it next?
The sadhu gave the address and the time. Jassi offered him some money and he left.
There is a raised platform for the drama that is called a stage. Also, there are one or two curtains. The drama is being performed like the drama of Krishna and people are watching the same. It is a very good show and the actors seem to be trained and talented. Jassi is also sitting and the sadhu is also sitting near her, so that when Rama comes in the body of the performer, he should be able to tell Jassi, and then she can fulfill her desire of meeting Rama, for
which she has been longing since childhood and which she thought might be fulfilled by the idol becoming alive.
Now, she has trusted the sadhu and she comes to watch the drama everyday. But her rough maid Dhabli does not leave the company of her mistress. She is also sitting and watching as to when the actor Rama becomes prophet Rama. She has no faith in this theory. She has come only as a security guard for her mistress, so that her mistress is not deceived. She is careful that if time comes, then she can stop her mistress from doing any wrong.
Suddenly, when actor Rama was performing the act of giving the throne to Bhabikan, then the sadhu said: See, prophet Rama has come.
Jassi saw that the actor who was performing as Rama has a brightness and a glow on his face. His face has changed.
Jassi had a craving to have a glimpse of Rama in human form.
She had a glimpse and started praying: O great Rama, you have come to bless Bhabikan. I am also a beggar for your blessings. Please do come down from the stage and let me touch your feet. My life's desire will be fulfilled. She got engrossed in the prayer.
The sadhu is saying something but she is engrossed in her prayer and has not listened to what he has spoken.
Dhabli is watching, sometimes towards the actor Rama, sometimes towards the sadhu and sometimes towards her mistress.
Un-intentionally, she bowed her head to her mistress and said in her mind: O my loving mistress, the Lord is within you. The Lord is omnipresent. Yes, my Lord is within you. I do not know where is your Lord. Again, she said to her mind: If the Rama, acting on the stage is the same prophet Rama, then why does he not know the devotion of my mistress, who is longing to have a glimpse and is now engrossed in prayer? Then she thought: I am uneducated. My mistress might know better.
Jassi remained sitting engrossed in prayer. Today's performance finished.
The sadhu is saying: Mother, the drama is over. The mother is in tears and feeling restless. She heard and got up holding Dhabli.
The sadhu then said: Mother, has your lifelong desire been fulfilled today? But she did not reply. She bowed her head and came away.
The drama continued for some days and after the scene of Rama reaching Ayudhia, it ended. But people asked the performers to start the drama from the beginning once again. The actors were talented and had acted very well and it had left a good impression on everybody's mind. People wanted to
watch it again. So, the theatre started again.
Jassi went for watching the same. She thought there was some shortcoming or fault in her and wished that the shortcoming may go and then Rama will hear her prayer and bless her. But whenever the sadhu told her that prophet Rama has come, she prayed in her mind, but at no time the actor Rama or so to say the prophet Rama intuitively heard her prayer.
She offered some money to the actor Rama and the sadhu. She also invited the actor Rama to her house and offered money in respect.
Jassi now, became sure that whatever it is, there is no intuitiveness. So in disappointment, she stopped going.
The sadhu also realized that the lady is sensible and she will not take a second step till she has put her first step on sure ground. She has realized that the story of prophet Rama coming in the body of actor Rama is not true.
The rough Dhabli even told the sadhu: It is everybody's thinking whether anybody sees Rama as a god or as an honest king or as a saint but if prophet Rama's soul enters the actor Rama's body, then why does the actor not get immersed in Rama's love? Then how can he do any further acting? When a woman who had become a statue becomes alive by Rama's touch, then why the actor Rama does not become image of Rama? (Looking towards Jassi) If iron touches a magnet, it becomes magnet.
Jassi heard her simple but intelligent talk and laughed.
Ill
Jassi's devotion now became known like Mira Bai's. Many saints and sadhus of different sects started coming to meet her.
Jassi would meet everyone in quest of her desire to have a glimpse of prophet Rama in human form.
The sadhus were greatly impressed by her devotion and singing of hymns but she had her own standard of criterion forjudging anyone, in her quest to have a glimpse of Rama. But no one came up to her mark.
Once, a very clever sadhu tried to take advantage of her faith in Rama. He said: The idols are of different types. Those idols that have been made by a real holy saint with devotion become alive when you worship them. This does not happen in ordinary idols made for money's sake. Jassi trusted his theory.
He said: On the night of Vijay Dashmi, my idol speaks and blesses. If you ask any question, then it replies also.
Jassi waited in curiosity for the Vijay Dashmi day. When the day came,
she went to the sadhu's place where the idol was installed. Dhabli also went along. Dhabli would not, in any case, allow her mistress to go alone.
There she sat in front of the idol in worship with devotion. After a short time, there was a sound like the bursting of a cracker. Those whose eyes were open closed their eyes and those whose eyes were closed opened their eyes but closed again because there was smoke all over. Then there was a flash. Then the eyes of the idol moved and it spoke: O saints, ask for something. I have come to give you. You will get whatever you wish. Whatever you wish, you will get
Jassi saw that the idol is the same and is speaking: You will get whatever you wish. Dhabli was watching but with a different idea. Immediately, she whispered in her mistress' ear: Don't ask for anything loudly. Ask in your mind.
Jassi already was praying in her mind only: O great Rama. Please come in my idol also, so that I can have your glimpse everyday.
I have no other desire. When you can come here, you can come there also. Don't make your devotee dependent on others. Consider me your servant and come to my house. You may give your glimpse everyday or sometimes but please appear in my idol at my house. Jassi was engrossed in this prayer. She did not ask anything loudly that the pandit could listen.
The pandit thought that the lady has become semi-conscious on seeing the brightness and grandeur of the idol. So, he shook her and when she opened her eyes he said: Mother, see the glimpse. Ask for anything. Your desire has been fulfilled. See the prophet is saying: You will get whatever you wish.
Now Jassi who did not want to disappoint the pandit, said: O Rama, give your glimpse. Give your glimpse. Always give your glimpse.
I have got everything else that you have given. Give your glimpse.
A voice from the idol said: It will so happen. It will so happen.
Jassi thought that the idol may say something more but again there was a sound of the bursting of a cracker and smoke and a flash and it was an idol as usual. Jassi offered some money and said bye and came away.
On reaching home she got busy with her usual meditation and singing of hymns. This practice she had never stopped. Now, she was waiting everyday that her idol will speak because it was a blessing that it will happen but the idol did not speak and even after waiting more and more it did not speak.
The pandit came to her again a number of times asking her to come again but she never went. She told him: I have had a glimpse once at your place and that is sufficient.
Jassi got through such experiences several times. Once a woman came and said: Mother, you are so intelligent. What are you thinking? Has any idol ever become alive? You look for some sadhu who is detached from the world. Rama lives in his devoted sadhus. Krishna lives in his devoted sadhus.
The Lord lives in those who are engrossed in devotion. One can reach the Lord by serving and adoring them. You try to find some one like that and make him your mentor. See, Dattatreya had 24 gurus and you have none.
Jassi thought: She seems to be right but it is somewhat risky.
In any case she did not reproach her. This woman kept on coming and by praising one sadhu often, she gained Jassi's confidence. Initially, Jassi went to the sadhu's place but later the sadhu also started coming to Jassi's house occasionally. The sadhu was quite clever. He had knowledge of scriptures and he could practice yoga as well.
Slowly, Jassi's heart melted for him.
But Dhabli had something special in her. Although she was rough and did not understand the deeper meaning of things, she had a clean and sensible mind. She was always worried about the safety of her mistress.
She started doubting that there is something fishy about this sadhu.
In the world one wants to find a good sadhu and there are good sadhus also, but sending messengers to promote their goodness is somewhat a farce.
So, she started making enquiries from some known people.
When Jassi became quite impressed, then the sadhu changed the manner of influencing her. He wanted her to believe that he himself is Rama and there is no other Rama.
When he became sure that Jassi is now influenced enough, then one day the sadhu straight forwardly said: See, Krishna told Arjuna 'You leave every other religion and have faith in me. Then you will be mine and you will always be with me'. If you seek Krishna's refuge now, he is not in human form. He is in name only. He is not that Krishna in human form that was sitting with Arjuna. At that time Krishna was in human form and he uttered with his tongue 'Take my refuge'. That Krishna was talking, listening, replying, eating and drinking. Now he is in name only and whoever takes his refuge will take it in name only. For those people Krishna himself said: O Arjuna, for those who take refuge in name only the path is difficult. So, now you think about your god because the prophet Rama who had blessed Bheelni at that time is now in name only. The prophet Rama who ate the berry offered by
Bheelni is not in human form now.
Jassi (as if woken from a slumber): Then, What is the meaning?
Sadhu: It is, that one should think somebody in human form as Krishna or Rama, whatever faith one has and take his shelter. His shelter only, is the Krishna's shelter or Rama's shelter.
jassi: Rama is a prophet of the Lord and about Krishna I do not know about his being a prophet. He is not my god.
Sadhu: For us both are equal. But even Rama is now in name only.
You try to see Rama in somebody living.
Jassi: Then, will I meet the prophet Rama in this way?
Sadhu: In a devoted sadhu, Rama and Krishna are both living.
Dhabli was listening to everything.
She heaved a sigh and said: O mistress, then you are my prophet Rama. I have taken your refuge and reached Rama.
Sadhu: You are devoted to your mistress. Well done.
Jassi: O.K. Respected sadhu, then you perform some miracle that the devotion towards Rama that I have in my mind should get out of my mind and I become devoted to a person and start thinking him as Rama. I do believe sadhus are devoted and their company can be fruitful but still I cannot think of a sadhu as prophet Rama and have faith in him as such.
Maybe there is a shortcoming in myself. Some day, I may start thinking that way.
Sadhu: If you keep loving these feet (pointing towards his own feet) then your fear will go and you will feel there is no other Rama excepting the person who is sitting in front of you now.
After talking all this, the sadhu left.
Today, there was a change in Jassi's mind. She went into deep thought. She became double-minded. The sadhu had thought that whatever step he has taken is a sure step but with what the sadhu had said, Jassi's mind got vacillated and she was in a quandary.
But after a moment she saw Dhabli coming from outside with alum in hand. She waved the alum around Jassi's head and went and put it in fire. Then she said: O mistress, you had been influenced by an evil eye. I have waved the alum around your head and put it in fire, so that the evil influence may go away from your mind and instead should strike the person who has
cast an evil eye on you.
Jassi: Am I a child that I can be influenced by anybody and then who will cast an evil eye on me?
Dhabli: That fake sadhu who came today and has been coming earlier also and whose eye balls were so big, today he was staring at you again and again. He was casting an evil eye on you all the time that he was talking to you. You were being influenced by his evil eye. I have been watching.
Jassi: He said, 'I am Rama'.
Dhabli: Well, if Rama is like him, then you forget Rama. I thought that the Rama you desire is handsome. If that Rama also has to cast an evil eye on you, then you forget everything.
Jassi was now out of deep thought and quandary and said: Dhabli, you have become too outspoken.
Dhabli: Well, have I said anything wrong? I consider Rama as handsome. Somebody who was selected by a beauty named Sita must be very handsome, with a round face and very sweet. How can he be ever like this fake sadhu, by seeing whose eyes, I was trembling with fear. That Rama must be very handsome, to whom an enlightened Janak gave his beautiful daughter in marriage. Do you understand now?
Jassi (laughed): Yes, I do understand now. I think you know something more also.
Dhabli: Yes. I do know.
Jassi: Then, tell.
Dhabli: I hope you won't be angry. You have considered him as Rama. Jassi: No. I won't be angry.
Dhabli: Then listen. The lady that comes here gets money from him for going to different houses and prompt people to become his disciples. Jassi (was startled): How do you know?
Dhabli: Our grocer, from whom I buy groceries, has told me. He said: Do you not know that this woman and this sadhu who visit your house often are all fake? Lady Jassi is pure and simple and full of devotion. Has she not been able to judge him? Then, I said: She will judge him slowly.
Jassi: Is it true?
Dhabli: Yes, it is true. I have enquired from other people also. It is true. Today, all the time he was sitting here, he was casting an evil eye on you. See your face has become bright now. The influence of the evil eye has gone away. Thanks to my alum.
Jassi meets sadhus but now she has reservations in her mind. She had a very ' oft heart and a pure mind that made her believe everybody as good and oie. Now doubt has entered her mind and her belief has got tainted with doubt.
But still she meets the sadhus who are known and are in Rama's devotion. She meets them without doubt with a pure mind.
But in the case of new sadhus, she meets them with a doubt in mind and keeps them at a slight distance.
Why did such things happen with Jassi?
Sometimes, to take advantage of her devotion to Rama, sometimes tc make her a disciple with the idea that if she becomes a disciple then man) more will follow soon and sometimes to get money out of her.
Although she was saved every time but that was because of her own sensible mind. In any case she was continuing with her worship and desired to have a glimpse of Rama.
In Mathura, Ram Rawan was the chief pandit of the Rama temple.
He was engrossed in the idol worship day-in and day-out. He was simple minded and of good character. He was much devoted to idol worship.
Jassi had lot of faith in him.
One day, he came to Agra specially to meet Jassi although he did not like to leave even one days' worship at Mathura.
At that time, Agra was not the Agra town as it is now. The Taj Mahal was also not built at that time but it was a populated city.
Ram Rawan came to the lady's house.
The lady met him with great regard and narrated to him all her experiences.
Ram Rawan became afraid. He thought for a moment and then said: It is safer to keep yourself engrossed in idol worship and not to meet anyone. The Lord will fulfill your desire for Rama's glimpse. Remain in devotion and be careful in trusting any person. Did any sadhu of another faith come to you?
Jassi: Do you mean Krishna devotee?
Ram Rawan: Rama, Rama, Rama. Do not utter any other name from your tongue. Remain in Rama's devotion only.
Jassi: One sadhu came. He was a Krishna devotee. He appeared to be gentle. He said: You have everything in you, devotion, love, meditation and purity but there is a fault in your idol. You worship the idol of the flute player. Although it is the same thing, but the idol of the flute player becomes alive quickly. See, one day, saint Jai Dev was writing his scriptures. In some
diffidence, he went out. In his absence Krishna came in the garb of Jai dev and wrote the lines quickly and went away. Have you ever heard of any other god coming in human form like that and giving proof of his godliness?
I said: Maybe you are right, but I have spent my life meditating in front of the idol of Rama. Now it is difficult for me to change my idol.
Similarly another sadhu said: Fulfillment of your desire can be through Krishna idol worship or better still, child Krishna idol.
I asked (in curiosity): Is child Krishna other than Krishna?
Whenever J assi uttered the words Krishna, Ram Rawan would put fingers in his ears and say Rama, Rama and then listen further. Jassi: Then he said, Krishna is one but we worship Krishna up to age twelve.
Again out of curiosity I asked: What is the reason to worship the same god up to a certain age and leave the rest of the age?
He smiled and said: There are many reasons, but the main reason is that a child becomes happy quickly. With a little devotion, he blesses.
This was something I liked, and I thought that when you come, I would ask you to get me an idol of child Rama.
Ram Rawan listened and laughed and said: But O Child, it is not holy to listen to somebody who does not worship Rama. You keep yourself in devotion and don't bother about others. Did any other sadhu come?
Jassi: Yes. One woman had come. She was from Bengal. She worshipped Shako' and said that god is the image of Shiv. Shiv and Shakti do everything. One should worship the idol of Shakti.
Well, pandit, those who worship Shakti eat meat also. I felt disillusioned that why Shakti is not against killing of animals. Then she said that to give life and take back life both is in the hands of Shakti. She talked many things but I felt frightened to see the idol of Shakti.
She left for Kangra Hills near Lahore.
Ram Rawan: O child, you say 'no' to sadhus of other faiths. It is good to be devoted to one god. The sadhus of other faiths divert your mind from your god and that is not good. A disturbed mind cannot fulfill its aim. Now, you stop meeting sadhus of other faiths.
Secondly, this idol of Rama that you have is small. It was all right for your young age. Now, I will send you a big size idol. I will myself come to install it here. I will install it with all rituals. That idol is very impressive. It will keep you in high spirits and you will be delighted.
Jassi said: All right.
In this way, prompting Jassi to be more earnest in her devotion, Ram Rawan left. After a few days, Ram Rawan came to Jassi's house. He brought with him a large sized idol wrapped in a bundle of clothes (being afraid of Mohammedan rulers). He kept the old idol in a corner and in its place installed the newly brought idol after performing many rituals.
Ram Rawan said to Jassi: You remain in self-esteem now. You are a real devotee. You think highly of yourself. Don't bow down in respect to every sadhu and don't talk to sadhus of other faiths.
The newly installed idol was a rare masterpiece, must have been sculptured by very talented hands. The idol was made of ivory and painted in different colors. The face was painted in wheat color. The eyes were beautiful and it appeared they were depicting something special. The bows and arrows were on the shoulder but the hand showed that it was blessing someone.
Jassi's eyes were charmed to see the beauty of the idol.
She became sure that the idol will really become alive and she will have a glimpse of Rama.
Ram Rawan was right in his own way. But he did not know the real desire of Jassi that was to have a glimpse of a living god.
Jassi imagined that by her worship and devotion the idol will become alive one day. Now Jassi is joyous to sit in front of the idol as anybody would be on seeing a masterpiece sculpture, but she thinks it is some power of the idol that makes her feel delighted.
Ram Rawan had found this idol from the antiques of the times when the standard of sculpturing was at its highest peak in India.
And even now the appreciators of art all over the world feel wondrous to see the antique sculptures of those times. Ram Rawan's visit had a good effect.
Now, Jassi does not meet any sadhu of a different faith.
She meets only the Rama devotees. She also now thinks herself big and enlightened as Ram Rawan had asked her to think like that.
Now, when she meditates in front of the idol, she feels joyous to see the beauty of the idol. She sings hymns to the accompaniment of sitar also but her longing to see the idol alive is not fulfilled.
The lady is pious doing goodness to others, singing hymns and has become known for her devotion. Now, many women are coming to meet her and her house has become a centre for idol worship.
Time passed by and now she entered old age.
VII
One day, the lady was sitting in front of the idols and singing hymns, when Dhabli who had gone out for some work, came back home and saw thatjassi, while singing hymns and playing the sitar was becoming still, as if sleeping. Finally, her fingers stopped, her hands fell down and she sat still like a statue for quite sometime.
Dhabli today, was in a hurry to tell something but she found that the ears that were to listen are not ready. Dhabli kept sitting nearby looking at her mistress' face with attention, with some delight, with some mercy and some amazement.
After some time Jassi heaved long and cold sighs and then she opened her eyes. She looked this side and that side and saw Dhabli sitting closeby. She indicated something with her hand and mouth that Dhabli could understand. Dhabli went and brought a cup of hot milk thatjassi drank sip by sip. Her body that had become stiff with cold, while sitting since early morning, became warm. Then she got up, went to her bedroom and lay down to sleep.
When she got up a little before noon, then Dhabli served lunch to her and said: I want to talk something to you.
Jassi: You have your food and scrub the kitchen. Then you may come upstairs. I am going upstairs.
After sometime Dhabli went upstairs and said: O mistress, see, for whom you are craving, has come.
Jassi (was startled and looked on all sides): Where? Where? Who? Who?
Saying this, she felt a sensation in her entire body.
Dhabli: I do not know 'Who'. Outside at a place is sitting somebody. You will say he is a sadhu only. But he is, whom you say is intuitive.
Jassi: You silly girl, what do you know about these things?
Dhabli: A silly girl will not know anything but love can know things. Yes. Love can know things.
Jassi: You better talk in detail.
Dhabli: Someone has come and is sitting under the old Margosa tree. He appears to be very good. The many sadhus that have come to you so far are not equal to even the sole of his feet, what to say of the eyes. Go and meet him. Your crying may stop and your eyes may be saved.
Jassi: I have seen many sadhus and I am tired of them. Now, I do not want to meet anyone.
Dhabli: But your longing has not gone. Your craving is the same. Jassi: You go now. Let me sleep a little. Dhabli: O.K. I will go.
Dhabli left but came back again and said: You tell me, when a person dies, the body keeps on lying. It cannot become alive again. How can an idol become flesh and body? And then, how can it become alive?
Jassi: You go, go. The idol can do anything.
Dhabli: Then, why Rama did not stay here for his devotees when he was in flesh and body like other people? What love he had for his devotees that they are now longing and crying for him? Oh!
Jassi: That is his wish.
Dhabli: Then the right thing is that you do not wish anything. If it is his wish to go and not come back then you discard your wish. Be happy in his wish. Why should you cry?
Jassi: O silly girl, what have you uttered?
Dhabli: I am silly but you listen to me. He has now wished to come and has come. Now you discard your wish of not going to meet him.
Jassi (laughingly): O Dhabli, what do you know?
Dhabli: Those who do not have knowledge can know those who are beyond knowledge. O knowledgeable, if you have knowledge then why can't you find Him? You have wasted your life in crying and spoiling your eyes. Well, now you go and get an idol of gold.
Jassi (angrily): And what do you know?
Dhabli: I know this much that you had fixed a certain criteria forjudging a sadhu and nobody could come up to the mark. Now, somebody has come who is up to the mark or even more. Somebody who fulfills the criteria fixed by a devotee is the Lord and somebody who fulfills the criteria fixed by the Lord is the real devotee. Jassi: Which Lord?
Dhabli: The Lord, I heard lives in the blue sky in the heaven who is the Almighty Lord.
Jassi: So, is that all your knowledge?
Dhabli: And your too much knowledge is to cry in front of the idol. It will neither listen, nor see, nor speak.
Jassi could not tolerate the insulting words. She raised her hand to give a slap but in that time Dhabli ran and reached downstairs.
Jassi was sitting in her bedroom upstairs. She just lay down and soon fell
asleep. As soon as she fell asleep, she had a dream. What she saw was that Dhabli has forcibly carried her, on her back and taken her to the old Margosa tree where somebody was sitting in a squatting position.
Jassi became eager to have a glimpse but to her bad luck the person was sitting with face and body wrapped in a white sheet. Jassi moved all round with eagerness but could not have a glimpse. The non-fulfillment of her inner desire to have a glimpse made her utterly disappointed and the disappointment became anger. She gave a slap to Dhabli on her face saying: O silly girl, you said somebody has come. Let's go to have a glimpse. Is this a glimpse that you have got me? Dhabli ran away and her hand struck the branch of the tree.
She felt a pain and woke up. She got up and saw that there was no Margosa tree and no glimpse. Only Dhabli was standing. Jassi made herself fully awake and conscious and then said: Why have you come again?
Dhabli said: Downstairs, the grocer has come and wants to talk to you.
Jassi: You go and make him sit in the drawing room. I shall come.
A little later, Jassi came down and went and sat in the drawing room.
The grocer whose name was Kasturia touched her feet.
Jassi: Long life to you. Say, how you have come?
Grocer: Mother, under the Margosa tree somebody has come, and is staying there since a few days, in the wilderness. It appears as if he is a meditative. But a meditative is generally skinny and bones. He has a dazzle on his face. One gets peace of mind by his glimpse. When he talks, it looks as if it is something new that he is talking about. He doesn't talk the usual way as other sadhus do. He sings divine songs of a new type, but mother the singing is such that one feels that the water of river Yamuna has stopped flowing to listen to the songs. If your mind says, you may go and see. It is not something ordinary. It seems something incomprehensible, supernatural. I am ajain and we do not generally meet people of other faiths. My head bowed down to him and I have got sure faith that Lord is there and He is showing Himself as love rays coming from his body.
Another strange thing is that the Mohammedan saints who do not bow to anyone have bowed down to him. Yesterday, I saw the Muslim priest bowing down to greet him.
Jassi: What is his faith?
Kasturia: Mother, he appears to be a prophet. He doesn't appear to be a follower of any faith but he does not talk ill of any faith. He picks up the good things of every faith and does not talk of the bad things. Wherever one is, on the
path of the Lord, he tells the fault and puts him on the true path. I feel he is from the heavens. He has an aura and a dazzle. He is a godly soul.
The grocer was known as a pious man in the locality. The lady knew that he is not the deceiving type. She trusted that what he has said is right and what the silly girl Dhabli had said, that he is not the usual type of sadhus, must be right also.
So, she said: O.K. Child, when you go, take me along. Grocer: Mother, I will go in the evening after about one hour from now. At that time his companion sings the divine songs. You be ready. I shall call you. Jassi said: O.K.
The grocer bowed to her and left.
The lady now, started thinking. Ram Rawan had asked her not to meet anyone of another faith. Ram Rawan is a pious sadhu. To disobey him is not good. But she wants to go also. She thinks: I do not know how much life is left.
If I die in disappointment my whole life is wasted. The Lord-sent chance that is there now should not be missed. Who knows, it may be goodness behind the veil. This Jain says he is good. He is pious and selfless. He has seen something that is why he has said that. What should I do?
Dhabli: O my beautiful mistress, what are you thinking? Ram Rawan had asked you not to meet people who worship other idols. He does not believe in any idol. He is from the heavens. Ram Rawan has not stopped you from meeting him. If Ram Rawan's eyes see him by chance, he will forget all his ascetic practices and penances. At least once you meet him. There is a lot of difference between seeing and listening. When you meet him, only then you will know.
Jassi thought that the grocer had said that he is not from any existing faiths. It is a new happening, a new path, path of truth. So, there will be no disobedience to Ram Rawan in going to meet him. This Dhabli is a blunt woman. I know she is not educated but her simple mind is sincere and true. She tells intuitively. She does not trust anyone. Today, she is all adoration for him. May be Dhabli is an intuitive woman and the Lord has kept her with me as a servant.
After all this thinking, she got ready and when the grocer called, she went with him. Dhabli also dressed herself in a Bikaner petticoat and blouse and a scarf, and thus immaculately dressed she went along.
VIII
On reaching the Margosa tree, she saw that one angel figure with a dazzle on his face, an image of the Lord, is sitting. His eyes are closed. A divine song is being sung. Some people are sitting at a distance. Some are from the city, but
two or three known sadhus and two or three Mohammedan saints are there and truly the Muslim priest and his son were sitting.
After glancing all round, her eyes got fixed on the angel figure and she felt an attraction. She had never felt such attraction from anyone before.
She felt the sensation of a pull on her forehead above the eyebrows and through the eyes, as if being pulled by a string, and going inside the head, where in childhood you feel is soft, and her eyes closed.
Today was the first day that the lady experienced a pull from the heart and the sensation of the same was felt on the forehead and then it went deep into the head inside at one place.
Now, the divine song that was being sung finished, but now the lips of the angel figure opened and he sang a song:
O Loving lady, what are you proud of? The Lord is inside you, and you are looking outside.
The song was sung in Tilang musical measure and it was heart piercing. The meanings of the song went deep into Jassi's heart. She was intelligent and accomplished in music, but here she saw, besides the music, the miraculous effect of the music.
Although the song was in Punjabi, still she was able to understand the meanings quite well. May be Jassi might have been from Punjab only.
Now, that she understood the meanings of the song, she realized her faults.
Her mind said: Fall at his feet and do whatever he orders. He is the Lord's image. He is all graciousness. He is all love. He is the giver of the Lord's nectar. So, when the song finished, she got up and fell at his feet.
The angel Guru, the great Guru Nanak touched her head and said:
Come, intelligent but ignorant lady. What for, are you having an ego? If the idol had become alive on your asking, then you could be proud of. Your entire life, you have been longing and craving. What is it that makes you proud? You were greedy that your idol should become alive. You should get fame. You should be counted as a big saint. But you did not realize that this body does not remain. It will die. After the body has died, they make a sculpture to look alike, but it doesn't listen or speak. Even if for the sake of believing, we believe that it will become a living body, again it will die, because the body has to die.
How can something that is born and dies become imperishable?
Only the Lord is always living. He is above death. But the Lord who is above death is formless. He is omnipresent. He is here, there, everywhere.
In whose heart, He has given his sensation, that is His temple. The Lord is not visible to these eyes because whatever is visible to the eyes has to die.
You cannot meet the Lord with these senses because whatever you see with your senses is something visible and what is visible is perishable.
The Lord is imperishable. He is here, there, everywhere. He is omnipresent.
He is nearest to your heart. He is inside you but you were searching Him outside. So you could not have faith that He is omnipresent and also inside you. You did not have the devotion of the Almighty. You did not have love for the 'All love Lord'.
Spending all the time like this you thought you are intelligent but you remained ignorant, like a child without any knowledge.
Now, you tell how will an intelligent person marry an un-intelligent girl.
The Lord you wish to marry is knowledgeable and you are ignorant.
First you did not understand Him. Then you did not love Him. So, you could not find Him. Now, how will you meet Him?
Speaking all this he became quiet.
Jassi's head was still at his feet. The benevolent hand was still touching her head. Jassi, at this time, was praying in her mind: O Lord's image you only tell what should I do?
Jassi is praying in her mind only as she used to do earlier.
But see, here she gets a reply at once. The Guru again said: Listen lady. Lord is inside you. He is omnipresent. He is not at one place. He is everywhere. He is near you. He is inside you. He is present everywhere. Have faith in Him. When you have faith in His presence, then you remember Him. If you forget that He is inside you, then again you are separated from Him. He is there. He is all love. 'He is my love'. This should ever remain in your mind. There should be no veil of forgetfulness in this.
In this way, remain in remembrance of the Lord who is inside you.
Remember His presence. Then whatever happens, think that it is His will. Accept it as good. When you have a deep faith in Him, the dirt of your mind will go and He will guide you Himself. He, who was, is and always will be.
His worship is, that you have to keep Him in your remembrance with love.
Now, He will be your guide. Whatever He says, you do. You merge your wish in His wish. Yes, whatever the Lord says, you do. Do not act on your own wish. Whatever He does, accept it as good. In this way your ego will go.
There are no brick walls between Him and us. The veil is the ego. This goes away in the manner that I have explained to you. When the ego goes,
then, with confidence, remembrance and love, the woman, the woman gets dyed in love to marry her Lord. Now, when He bestows His grace, when He looks towards her with a benevolent glance, she will become a bride. Then she will be considered beautiful. She will be considered a devoted lady. She will be considered as intelligent and knowledgeable.
So, without these qualities, without the love of the Lord, without understanding the real knowledge that I have said, you were searching for the Lord. You were longing for His glimpse and wished to meet Him. You remained ignorant like a child.
Yes, Jassi, you remained ignorant. You remained without knowledge. You could not judge the value of anything properly.
The Guru, again said: Love is a precious thing. It has value, when you love something precious. When you love something that is perishable. Then that something will perish and you will repent.
So, you should have considered the value of your love, whether it was worthwhile to love the perishable bodies or the lifeless idols, in the name of the imperishable Lord. You sold your love so cheap by indulging in the longing to have a glimpse of a perishable body.
Think. Your soul is imperishable. The Lord is imperishable.
The imperishable loving the imperishable is the value for the love and that is the correct value.
O Jassi, from the beginning only we should look towards the imperishable.
The Lord is imperishable. Your soul is imperishable.
The imperishable loving the imperishable is imperishable.
Now, the angel Guru lifted Jassi's head with strength. Jassi now got up and sat down. Her body was like a flower. She felt an ecstasy in her mind, heart and body cells. What the Guru had said to her, and what was in the divine song went into her mind and her mind became enlightened.
She said to her mind: Yes, I remained ignorant and in forgetfulness all my life. It was a small point but I could not perceive. No. Not small but so big that my small mind could not understand it and could not perceive it.
True knowledge, soul awakening knowledge, devotion, true devotion, devotion to meet the Lord, I have learnt today only.
But what will I have to do? What I have understood is that the Lord is formless and beyond the vision of these eyes. What will I do to meet Him?
How will my mind go towards the Lord? This mind wanders in its own way. Who will stop this mind to wander? Should I ask? Is it not impertinent to
ask? At this time Dhabli was looking at her mistress' face, not as a servant looks at his master's face but as a loving mom looks at her son who comes home after a long time.
She said: O, mistress. You ask whatever you want to. He is a cloud of ecstasy. Today, he has come here to rain blessings. Tomorrow he may go elsewhere to bless. You fill your heart, mind and soul with his blessings. (Looking upwards) A Bikaner girl may be also blessed with the Lord's name. O mistress, you do ask.
Although Jassi did not realize that Dhabli was intuitive but she thought that it is her pure love that she has said this.
Dhabli's prompting her to ask, gave her confidence and with folded hands she said: O benevolent Guru, O benevolent Guru, O benevolent Guru, you give some support to my mind. How will the mind keep this remembrance of the Lord who is formless? How will the mind keep it all the time? It will be wandering again.
The benevolent Guru said: The Lord is inside us. He is nearest to us. This should not be forgotten at any time. It is the mind's job to keep this in remembrance, but if it gets mixed up with worldly desires, then you have to keep the remembrance on your tongue.
The tongue should recite His name: 'O Lord', 'O Lord', 'O Lord'.
The mind should think of the Lord, the goodness of the Lord, the praises of the Lord, the love of the Lord.
This is the recitation of the Lord's name. This is the worship of the imperishable. This is the worship of the Lord.
When we go on the path towards the Lord, then we have faith that he is there. This presence of His is remembered by recitation. The recitation then gets deep into the mind, heart and body cells.
So, you start reciting the Lord's name by your tongue: 'O Lord', 'O Lord', 'O Lord'.
This will be your bodily worship. This is a work. But it is a spiritual work This is a work of the mind. This will give elevation to the mind and body.
With the recitation of the Lord's name by the tongue, the mind remains in remembrance, and with remembrance in mind one gets immersed in the love of the Lord. Then one is delighted and feels the ecstasy.
Then the recitation of the Lord's name becomes incessant.
The Guru again said:
O Jassi, always remain in recitation. Recitation is service to the Lord. Recitation is worship of the Lord.
Recitation is the love of the Lord, who is imperishable. Then the benevolent Guru sang a divine song:
I live when I recite His name,
I die when I forget His name.
Jassi was blessed. She got ecstasy. Her recitation became incessant.
It became: 'Those are living, whose mind is immersed in the Lord's love'.
The benevolent Guru came from the heavens and woke up a sleeping soul and blessed her with the Lord's name.
The benevolent Guru's miraculous eyes planted a seedling of the Lord's name in Jassi's mind and made it blossom as a flower.
Jassi took the benevolent Guru to her house. The Guru stayed at her house for ten days. A holy congregation came into being. Many people stuck midway in the Lord's path and many others were blessed.
News reached Ram Rawan that Jassi has changed her worship. Instead of the idol worship she has started worshipping the omnipresent Lord.
From rituals, she has changed to love of the Lord. He came in haste, with the idea that some sadhu of another faith will be sitting there, and I shall be able to win him over.
But here, was sitting the gracious Guru, the Lord's image.
On seeing him, he hesitated a little. He trembled when he saw the dazzle on his face. He was quiet for some time. He thought that the change was against his faith and he was angry. But he did not talk.
Jassi greeted him with respect.
The Guru saw that Jassi's mentor of idol worship has come and he is quite pious otherwise. So, he looked towards him and said: Ram Rawan, the Lord is everywhere. Don't try to pin Him in the idol. Open your eyes. He is All-pervading.
Ram Rawan felt a sensation of the Lord inside him, but Ram Rawan was quite knowledgeable about his own faith. So, he started questioning. But in a short time he stopped questioning and came to believe that:
The Lord is above everything else. He reveals Himself in His name, and recitation of Name is the prime worship.
Ram Rawan stayed there for some days and was blessed by the benevolent Guru.
In this way after planting the seedlings of the Lord's name in many people's minds and taking out many people from their mistaken beliefs, the benevolent Guru departed like a fragrant breeze going from one place to another.
Jassi now headed a holy congregation of Guru-disciples at Agra. Ram Rawan also came to stay at Agra.
Dhabli, the silly girl Dhabli, who, it seemed laughed at everyone, also got into the recitation of the Lord's name with love.
The benevolent Guru always liked that wherever there were people on the spiritual path, simple and true, he would reach there and put them on the true path of 'recitation of the Lord's name with love'.
In this way, when one person was blessed then, all the followers of that person were automatically benefited. By blessing one person many were automatically blessed.
The Guru's command to Jassi is repeated once again:
Start reciting the Lord's name by your tongue: 'O Lord', 'O Lord', 'O Lord', 'O Lord' O Jassi, Always remain in recitation Recitation is service to the Lord Recitation is worship of the Lord
Recitation is love of the Lord, who is imperishable.
□ □ □ □